Being a parent is never easy, but nowadays people have to be especially flexible, as all kinds of new family situations are coming about. It?s unusual in today?s environment for most people to stay married to the same partner all of their lives. This means, among other things, that it?s very likely you?ll find yourself raising step children at some point. Our main goal in this report is to give you some pointers to make your life as a stepparent proceed smoothly.
You must understand that kids that have lost a parent will feel emotionally negative and will be carrying with them a great emptiness. However, some step parents find themselves in a situation where the kids have been without the second parent for years, perhaps as long as they can remember. Your presence in their lives may be very difficult for the children as they have always had one parent, not two. Most step parents find it easiest to leave the argumentative situations to be handled by the biological parent and their children. Allow your spouse and the stepchildren to have time together, letting them slowly merge into you being in their life.
Those that find themselves trying to fit into a household with teenagers, and not grade school children, may have their work cut out for them. With teens, you can?t expect to be seen as a parent, so don?t even try to take on this role. The teenagers may not accept you, but this does not mean you have no power or control now that you are in their life. After all, parents aren?t the only authority figures in the lives of children -they also have teachers and others in the community as well. You must strike a balance as not only as an authority figure within their lives, but a friend that they can turn to in a time of need. Teens, as a general rule, do not accept things very easily, especially a new parent that is seen as replacing the biological one that is now gone.
The next thing you need to consider is communication between yourself and your spouse while raising these children. You want to do this because life is not predictable and differences of opinion will arise from time to time.
In general, as the step parent, you should defer to the children?s biological parent. It is important for the step parent, however, to be able to interact and interject thoughts and opinions at crucial times. When both of you talk to the children, always discuss in private what you?re going to say before you talk to them so that you are of the same opinion.
In conclusion, bringing children into a new marriage is never easy and will offer challenges above and beyond those of starting a new marriage without children. In today?s world, 50% of those who marry eventually get a divorce. Also, many people wait to marry until they are older and, as a consequence, may marry someone who already has children. Whatever the circumstances, many more marriages today begin with one or the other of the new spouses ? sometimes both ? having children from a previous relationship. Give a lot of thought to the best role you should assume with your new step-kids and remember, it?s very important to ?go with the flow? and exercise patience in order to succeed.
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Source: http://www.articleplusx.com/2012/02/raising-step-children-tips-you-need-to-know-for-success-2/
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